Behind Each Person Is A Story Of Courage
It is often said that a person is not really born until life strikes him. Until she learns to be strong. Adversity is a powerful source of learning, a time when we truly discover what identifies us and what we are worth fighting for. Behind each person is a story of courage.
However, we need to know that happiness and times of well-being are stages in which we expand our knowledge. Each person carries a map of their experiences. It’s a backpack of its own that no one sees, but it’s there. It is full of dark moments, lights, tears and sequelae.
What made us strong made us wise. Although we know that this wisdom sometimes came from pain.
Behind each person is a story of courage
The human being is much stronger than he seems. The brain is programmed to survive. Our genetic code helps us learn from adversity.
This explains, in a way, why it costs us so much to “be happy.” The idea of happiness is of no use to our brains, because the key to survival is to be able to react to danger, threat or loss.
Happiness occurs only when we are able to overcome the storm. The human being has advanced throughout history, tearing down obstacles and difficulties. This is, in essence, the learning that matters and allows us to achieve genuine well-being.
We were born stronger than we think. However, we are often unaware of this.
The personal story: the story of a traumatic childhood
There is always a dramatic event behind each person: a loss, an emotional failure, a disappointment… If you experienced any of these events as a child, it is very possible that the trauma will accompany you forever. Pain is not forgotten, but we learn to live with it.
A child does not have the psychological resources to cope with adversity, so the pain will significantly affect his development and personality. However, as the neurologist and psychiatrist Boris Cyrulnik explains, a traumatic childhood does not imply the appearance of a traumatic maturity. We need to be able to deal with these facts. We can recover, provided we have additional support and help. We will be able to look at the world again with balance and confidence.
We all deserve to be loved, we all deserve to be happy again.
Resistance and strength inside
We must not forget that the term “endurance” comes from physics. The quality of the materials is what allows them to regain their original shape. However, when people suffer emotional damage, it changes. Normally, when we turn into someone else, we turn into a stronger person.
This process is called resilience. Our brain, as we indicated at the beginning, is “programmed” to deal with adversity. He wants us to move forward, to survive, to learn from fear and difficulty.
Why sometimes we can’t be resilient? There are three reasons:
- Education and genetics
- The social context
- Inadequate psychological strategies
Learned resilience
There are people who know how to face the blows of life. Some people seem to be able to approach things more temperately. It can be by nature or by experience: resilience can be trained. To achieve this, we offer you three phrases to say out loud every day:
- I have the ability to cope with difficulties. I have values, rules of conduct, self-esteem and people who love me.
- I am a person who believes in hope and has self-confidence.
- I can solve problems, I can communicate, I can defend myself, I can have good relationships and I can fight for my happiness.
There are simple strategies that can “shape” our brains to give us strength, courage and that indispensable pillar that will help us go through life: endurance.
